Enneagrams, Knowing Self, and Sacrifice
Hello friends,
Greetings from the outskirts of Austin!
Currently, when I'm sending this, I'm at my retreat center for my church, and I hope to update more on it another time when I actually get to reflect :)
Anyways, recently, I have started to get really into reading Enneagram types.
If you don't know what Enneagram types are, they're personality types based on characteristics and behaviors we lean towards. Similar to Myers Briggs, Enneagrams provide a different lens that, in my opinion, gives a more complex understanding of who we are, and has many interesting applications to work, relationships, and personal reflection.
If you haven't taken it before, I highly recommend taking the Enneagram Test. (I am a type 2 wing 3)
As an Enneagram type 2, I love to help people - to care and support others as best as I can. Though a downside to caring for others as a type 2 is feeling entitled to a response because of my affection (as well as an obsessive need for affirmation), the positive is a desire to pour out all I have to others so they can know they are acknowledged and thrive in whatever they venture into.
Learning about myself as a type 2 has allowed me to better know myself, fundamentally changing how I serve and giving me a heightened awareness of my greatest strengths, as well as greatest downfalls. As I understand what fundamentally pushes me forward or causes me to shy away from situation, I've been able to gain insight over the interpersonal dynamic I have with others and it has helped me know how to serve others best.
Knowing myself is important if I hope to see others learn, grow, and change to become better people in their faith, vocation, giftings, expertise, and passions.
But one paradox I've come to realize is that as I got to know myself more, sacrifice and loving others became so much harder.
On one hand, I started to learn to invest in myself in spiritual disciplines and productivity, learning to steward as best as I can my time, treasure, and talents.
On the other hand, I started to recognize that I began to wrestle with my own selfishness. As I got to understand what made me better and what hindered me, I found myself becoming more unwilling to sacrifice on other people's terms and attempt to live on my own terms.
It's crazy, because initially when I was fully absorbed in serving others before I knew myself, it was easy to not care for my own needs because I didn't know what they were. In doing so, I poured out so fully, but it caused me to get burnt out and deteriorate in my own ability to serve others.
Yet as I grew in the knowledge of myself in order to gain a greater heart, strength, and influence to serve others, I found myself hesitating to sacrifice, and felt a heavier burden to bear when I made that decision to lose something for someone.
The sacrifice beforehand was easy to let go, since not knowing what I had lost, I blindly paid the cost in the future through burn out and stress.
But now, after gaining a deeper understanding of my values, my boundaries, and my passions, the choice to make a sacrifice for others was a fight between the flesh and the Spirit.
It makes me wonder how Jesus served and cared for others as an all-knowing God.
To know himself so well and know how deeply corrupt and unworthy we all were. He was justified to judge and condemn us as sinners undeserving of anything. And yet for Him to look at us patiently and lovingly, denying himself and picking up that cross whilst giving up his life knowing that the act of grace he sacrificed may never be reciprocated but desiring to exemplify humility and forgiveness in all it's fullness.
That's a sacrifice drenched in deep love.
... I don't know.
That hits hard for me personally. It challenges me to consider the sacrifices I can choose to make and relinquish whatever pride and selfish desires I have even whilst knowing myself to take on that same yoke that Jesus has taken on too.
It challenges me to consider grace...
Personal Prayer Requests
Speaking of grace, I would like to ask for prayer for that in my own life.
I've recently come to the conclusion that I have a lot of pride in my ministry and a lot of things I want to achieve and I have a lot of insecurities I'm trying to cope with through control and a legalistic viewpoint of my life.
The only thing I believe can humble me and bring me to Christ is to, as a fellow brother shared to me, gain a "rich robust understanding of grace" in this current season I'm in.
Please pray for me to understand, to experience, and to imitate grace.
Additionally, please pray for me and my fellow brothers and sisters in Christ at this retreat. The theme is "Calling" and there's a lot of weight that comes behind that which I hope to see in others.
Please pray for clarity and revelations in our general and personal calling, as well as breakthroughs as we complete the fast!
Anyways, I'm glad to be able to share this with y'all, as well as ask for prayer. Though I cannot express it fully, I'm blessed to be living this life on life with you guys through this newsletter. Please share to me any prayer requests you have personally, as I'd love to pray for y'all.
Anyways, keep on fighting the good fight and running the race my friends, and I hope to catch you guys in the next update :)
Weekly Collections
Faith
How Do I Grow in Wisdom? - Ask Pastor John Podcast
9 Ways to Guard Your Personal Relationship with God - Crossway
Entrepreneurship
How Will You Measure Your Life? - Harvard Business Review
Productivity
Harvard Business Review has a lot to say about how Time Management Is About More Than Life Hacks:
"Here, time management is defined as the decision-making process that structures, protects, and adjusts a person’s time to changing environmental conditions.
Three particular skills separate time management success from failure:
Awareness: thinking realistically about your time by understanding it is a limited resource.
Arrangement: designing and organizing your goals, plans, schedules, and tasks to effectively use time.
Adaptation: monitoring your use of time while performing activities, including adjusting to interruptions or changing priorities.
Of these three skills, arrangement is probably the most familiar, especially considering that the majority of apps and hacks deal with scheduling and planning. However, there isn’t the same widespread recognition of awareness and adaptation skills...
There are three steps you can take to prime your improvement efforts:
Build accurate self-awareness of your time management skills.
This can be accomplished by using objective assessments like a microsimulation, seeking feedback from others like one’s peers or boss, or establishing a baseline of behaviors against which gauge improvements.Recognize that preferences matter, but not how you think.
Self-awareness of one’s preferences or personality related to time management, such as multitasking or being proactive, can deepen an understanding of where you might struggle as your change efforts go against existing habits. But remember that skills, not personality, are the most malleable personal attributes and provide the greatest ROI on self-improvement efforts.Identify and prioritize the skill you need to improve.
Although this sounds obvious, the key point here is to avoid self-improvement that is an “inch deep, but a mile wide,” where efforts are spread too thin across too many needs. It is best to prioritize your skill development, focusing on the most pressing skill need first and then moving on to the next."
Here are just some of the tips from the article I use to effectively take action for each of the particular skills for time management:
Treat your time like it’s money - Create a time budget that details how you spend your hours during a typical week. Categorize time into fixed time (“must do’s”) and discretionary time (“want to do’s”).
Schedule protected time - Make calendar appointments with yourself to ensure uninterrupted time to dedicate to your most important projects.
Try “habit stacking.” - Tie your time management behaviors to habits you already exhibit (e.g., track daily progress every evening when you sit down for dinner).
Feel free to read more in the article.
Prayer Topic
The Next Generation of Leaders in the World
Pray for servant leaders who will take on the cost and responsibility to lead well
Pray for leaders who will have a deep love for their organization and the people in it
Pray for leaders who will be wise and well equipped in their spheres of influence
Verse of the Week
“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.”
- Philippians 4:8
Challenging Quote
“We must arrange life so sin no longer looks good to us”
- John Ortberg